Short funny online dating profiles


Wife: “Windows frozen.”
Husband: “Pour some warm water over them.”
Wife: “Computer completely screwed up now.”

What I haven’t yet mentioned is that Tom Pandolfo is 5’3″.
I didn’t want to mention it for the same reason that Tom didn’t want to mention it in his profile: because it’s irrelevant to anything that makes him a good accountant, husband, or father. Yet his height defines him, since it has prevented otherwise interested women from being interested in him over the course of his entire life.

VGstockstudio/shutterstock You know those barely clothed selfies that certain people are always posting on social media? That's a "thirst trap"—"thirst" being an all-too evocative popular term for desperation, sexual and otherwise. Are people really trolling for compliments with scantily clad six-pack abs or dangerous curves? Probably depends on the person. In a recent interview with Vice magazine, one online personality boasted about her "incessant need for external validation...strangers on the Internet always come through for me [and] I don't think there's anything wrong with embracing that." So if you're serious about cuffing season, don't keep tuning those thirst traps! Keep it moving along instead.


Short funny online dating profiles

Short funny online dating profiles



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